Stick it in the fridge.

Before getting my day rolling, I was going to have a piece of toast with some peanut butter and maybe a bit of honey on it. I'm thinking: crunchy warm bread, thick peanut butter, a good savory way to start the day.

Our bread—as usual—was in the refrigerator. Some of you may not have heard of the band G. Love & Special Sauce, but they've got this song which includes something like:

I like cold bread with jam
I like cold bread with jam
uh-huh
Stick it in the fridge

...and so on. It's very catchy. I really like it. Anyway, I started singing that to myself as I pulled the bread out of the refrigerator and kept on singing while I peanut-buttered it up and drizzled honey on it.

I like cold bread with jam, uh-huh

I put the peanut butter in the cabinet, and the bread back in the refrigerator.

Stick it in the fridge stick it in the fridge stick it in the fridge

I picked up my snack, and headed out of the kitchen as I took a bite.
Ack! *cough* *sputter!* What?
Something was absolutely wrong and I couldn't figure it out for a split second. Duh! I forgot to toast the bread! Dammit G. Love! You and Special Sauce and the power of suggestion made me peanut-butter my bread without toasting it first! Somewhere you're laughing, so I can only laugh with you.

I tried toasting the whole thing in our little toaster oven. (One of the greatest kitchen appliances of all time!) Sadly, by the time the bread had toasted on the bottom and sides, the peanut butter had bubbled and browned. Hot browned peanut butter on semi-toast was really not what I had in mind at all.

Now I'm worried it's gonna be one of those days.


Follow up:
Huh... that's funny. I just talked to my friend Mitch, who almost certainly introduced me to that song in the first place. He thought the story was extra funny because the lyrics are not:

I like cold bread with jam

but are actually:

I like cold beverages